…Love, February

Photo by God's Unspoken Ministries

The year started with a wonderful January.   I started over some things that I wanted to do last year, but never have the motivation to do it.  Have you ever felt like that before?  Your intentions were good, but then you get sidetracked, and the interruptions get in the way. 

About the middle of January came the “Ice Age.”  If you have ever lived in the upper middle part of the United States, the cold snap usually begins at the Colorado border, goes upwards to the “Dakotas,” hitting every state along the way, shoots across towards Michigan, and ends up in Maine.  Not this year.  It started around Utah, and then without warning, that cold snap, which really wasn’t a cold snap at all, more like what happens when Antarctica takes over, shoots across the rest of the country, like a speeding bullet.  It attacked every state, except California, Nevada, Arizona, New Mexico, and the lower half of Florida.  There were states, like my state of Ohio, who was kind of used to it, while states like Georgia were so scared, people left their cars on the freeways, and started walking home without them.  Schools in Texas closed at 39°, while the schools closed here in Columbus when the temp hit a -1° or lower.  Even then, the biggest school districts were sometimes afraid of closing.  My lights went out one time.  I also had the heater on all night, which was a first for me.

It is now February 1^st, and love is in the air.  I have told you about the heartaches I have had when finding a man and sometimes being blissfully single is not all it is cracked up to be.  This February, I am not going to dwell on that. Black (Or African American) history is this month.  There are so many things that African Americans have created that we use today, but it seems to me, there was either a half of a credit for that invention, or no credit at all.  I am not saying people need to take back what was said, just give credit where credit is due.

What hurts me the most, is when people do not believe in what another person can give to a situation.  That is in all races, not just the African American race, but all.  Parents want their children to do EXACTLY what they say do with their career and life.  Men want women to do the same.  People have a preconceive notion that what they say goes.  They do not want to hear what the other person has to say.  They do not want to hear that there are more ways today to do something, then back in the last century.  It is “my way or the highway.”  As long as you are willing to work 40 hours a week for 40 years, and in return get 40% of what you earned during those 40 years, that is the only way you are going to retire.  Period.  What they do not realize, is people today are not willing to work 40 hours for 40 years at a company who could give a living crap about you.  There are other ways to work. What they also do not realize is that you are living for you, not them, and that is what makes it so hard for them to let go.  So, they have to keep telling you what to do, when to do it, and how to do it.  That is very sad to me, and I do not know why they do it.  

The problem is races have been doing it for years, spouses have been doing it for years, and parents have been doing it for years.   I said, “Stop it and live for you, and do not worry about what I or the other person is doing.”  “Let me live my life, and if you want to help, fine, help is greatly appreciated, but if you don’t want to help, there are other ways for people to find that help if they know where to look.”  This also goes for the person who depends on that help as well.  There are two kinds of dependency in an adult life, and I do not like neither one.

So this is my Love, February statement, and I would say it again, again, and again.  Be a blessing by giving advice, listening to what the other person has to say, and excepting any solution to end the situation.   That is the best help you can give.