What's with the Gaydar...can a person just Be single?

Ok, there I said it.   What's with the gaydar all of a sudden?   I was reading Facebook 5 mins ago (Can you tell I love to read), when I ran across this article on my news feed, "Oprah Admits She is Gay".  So like any curious person, I clicked on it.  It is some video of her talking to Barbara Walters two years ago.  It is edited, but the question to Oprah was is she gay?   I am not going into details with the video, but like I said, it’s edited, and bad editing at that. This is the second time in the past 24 hours I read where someone has reported that a celebrity is supposed to admit that they are not what they are in the public eye.   12 hours ago, I read about Queen Latifah and her personal trainer having a little smooch on the cheek and then she was at the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender event in Long Beach, CA calling them "her peeps".   

What I want to know is when did this country become one great big National Enquirer rag paper?   Did I fall asleep in some alternative universe where gaydar is the norm?  Yes I am calling it right, GAYDAR.  Why are we as a country so concern if someone like Queen and Oprah admit that they are gay.   I know I am not.   So why am I writing this post?  Simple, because this society has this problem that if anyone over the age of 35 who does not have a man or a woman under their arm or mentions they have one, they must be gay.   Well guess what?  I am over the age of 35, I am single, never had a date to save a life, but yet I want a man.   I am not being picky about my selection of men, but I want the right one to come along and sweep me off of my feet.   does that mean I am gay?   I want you to ponder that for a moment.

At the time, I was married to having a career, just like some women I know.  We are not out there running after a man to take care of us.  Hey, if they want to do that, it is fine with me, but I do not except handouts.  Apparently nether do stars like Oprah who want it all.  we are not the generation who were taught that you let a man sweep you off your feet, and then when you get married, you sit down and eat bonbons all day, or if you work, you give hubby the paycheck, and you get an allowance. That went out with the 1970's.  Today, you can get hubby the dinner, be attentive to his needs, and still be your own woman with children.  Marriage is a 50/50 thing, an equal partnership.  Just because some women waited, and still waiting does not mean that we want a woman to keep us warm instead of a man.   I used to think that I would never have a man because they were all taken, and yes, I might have at one time preferred a single man with no children who is part of my race (which is African American ), but now I am open.  He can be divorced, single, with or without children, white, brown, or Asian, but he must apply himself.  He does not need a degree in something, but he needs to be working.  He also has to profess Jesus as his Lord and Savior.   I will not stop going to church, praying or reading the bible because of a man.  I will not stop working because I have a man either.   

Look, even if they were gay, which stars like Rosie O'Donnell, Ellen DeGeneres, and Wanda Sikes have admitted to being gay in the last few years, so what business is it of ours?   They feel comfortable about it enough to announce it on television.  There are some like Robert Reed (of Brady Bunch fame) who went to the grave with it.  (Only a hand few of people know about it until after his death)

So please stop with the gaydar.  If they are, they are, and if not, Oh well.  None of my business.  As they say, different strokes for different folks.  Worry what is going on in your own back yard, and leave everyone else's alone.  Gossip is not good for the soul or your spirit.

I swear...NOT!

I was browsing a website called Seeded Buzz.   This is a website where you buzz (write) about things on your blog and then you place a seed (post) for someone else to read about it.  I have listed that I will do buzzes about my MDN Creates blog, but not this one, because I created the account two years ago.  Just trying to put my name out there.

Well, a little buzz came up about swearing on blogs.  Honestly, I have been taught by my parents (my mother mostly) not to swear at all.   I have listened for the most part, but every now and then, I slip up.  If you are a good Christian you will slip up, but then in your prayers, that is when you ask for God's forgiveness, and he will.  Now I was told there is an unforgivable sin that will ultimately get you thrown into that Lake of Fire that I do not want to see...ever.  That unforgivable sin is blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, according to Mark 3: 28-30, Matt 12: 30-32, Luke 12:8-10, Hebrews 6:4-8, and Hebrews 10:26-29 in the bible.  Ok, that is as far as I am going to get with that part of the subject of swearing.

Everyday swearing (is there such a thing?) 

We have all heard it, and it is not going away soon.   It comes in the form of lyrics to a song, a soap diva calling another one a female dog, and I have heard a couple of cartoons using that kind of language.  It used to be that if you so much have thought of a curse word, your mouth got washed out with soap.  I first got a taste of saying a curse word one day in high school.  I had just gotten my books out of my locker after school was over, when a boy that I was friends with said something to me that made me frustrated, and I cursed him out of the school.  He never thought that I would say such a thing to him, and I never thought that would ever come out of my mouth.   When things do not go my way, that when it hits me, but since then, I have learned to gain back that control, and letting God have his way with my mouth once again.  That does not mean that I am not going to slip up.   This brings me back to the little buzz I just saw on Seeded Buzz.    Surprisingly, I have not sore on any of my posts, nor any comments.   The post I wrote yesterday on the frustration about the negativity  I have seen on a group I just quit, I have not cursed at them at all.  In fact I offered to pray for the women causing it in the first place.   I wanted to make 2012 a year of positivity in everything that I do.  That does not mean I was causing the negativity in my life to happen in the first place.  

Swearing creates that, and is one of Satan's playgrounds.   We are letting everyone get away with it.  Four months ago, I wrote a piece on MDN Creates about my niece who is 3 years old.   In that post, I talked about her giving me and my sister the surprise of our lives when she cursed out loud.   I was not writing it to be cute about the situation.  In fact, me, my sister, and my mother had an intervention on this preschooler.  I think we sort of scared her, because I have not heard my niece curse since that time.   I know this is not the end of her potty mouth (as Super Nanny calls it), but for now, I can rest in knowing that I, nor Miss Nine'na's mother and grandmother do not have to put her in time out for it.

So do I swear?  Yes, when it slips.  In my blogs?  No.  Do I ask for forgiveness from God?  Yes, I do.  I am human.  Is this an excuse?  Of course is it, but I am also forgiven, as well as anyone else who do and ask for that forgiveness, but do not slip up to the point where you utter that unforgivable sin.  Again, I do not want to see that Lake of Fire...ever.   God Bless you.   

Freedom

I am a spoiled person.  So are you, if you live in America.   We have the privilege to say whatever it that comes to mind.  The tongue is a very powerful instrument as well.  When connected to the mind and thoughts of a person, it can be used to say anything from a kind word or two, providing sympathy to a grieving person, or cut a person in two by cursing and swearing with words.  Sometimes we take advantage of that freedom as well.

Yahoo allows like-minded people to come together to form a group.  In these Yahoogroups, you can get together for things, such as a love of gun collection, a particular breed of dog, and sell groups to name a few 100,000.   I just unsubscribed from a group, which I have been a part of for over 5 years.   It is a Longaberger group of consultants, leaders and customers.  This group are not endorsed by the company, so they do not monitor the content coming from it.   Well, in the last few months, the company started some programs that allows a consultant like me to have more ways to grown my business.  Sounds good, right?  I mean who doesn't want more business.  Apparently, these ladies who are also consultants do not, and they have stated that in the group.  From the time I reported nothing but good things that have happened to my business because of two of the new programs, I have had nothing buy negative comments.  Yes, they have the freedom of speech on their side, but I have had it with the negativity, so I left.  Before I left, I wrote the group a final post, explaining why.   I am going to show this note to you, striking out parts that were deemed private:

To the Group:

I have had my last negativity with this group.   You know, they say if you want some positivity in your life, you cut ties with those who do not share in your joy and vision.   I love Longaberger, and I love how things are going as far as they as concern with this company.  People do not like change, and there are some people do not like how this company has been run.  I agree with Carrie about this policy 100%, and there have been times when I have report nothing but good things that happened with my business, and I get people like Robin and mahiler commenting with often times a negative comeback.  Yes, this country is founded on freedom of speech, and yes, this group that allows you to say whatever comes out of your mouth, good or bad.  I can say that for the first time in 4 years that I am finally making my goal, and I thank God for allowing me to work for a company like Longaberger, who believes in their selling team.  I told my NSL who is also my central branch leader that, after I looked at my sales totals, and compared them to the amount I set for the 2011-2012 selling season.   I may not agree with everything that Tami and the rest of the executives decide for this company, but I roll with the punches, and I do try to see where I fit in the big picture, I make the best of it, and make adjustments where I can.   Yes, you are going to say something negative.  I can feel it as I write my exit speech but I am going to say it anyway.  I also agree that if you are not happy, leave, and that is what I am doing with this group.  We have argued about policies of Longaberger, new programs Longaberger has implemented, and other things, and I have weather the storm.  Well I have had enough of it.   mahiler, I am glad that your sales are up despite your constant complaints about the company to this group and your customers.  It is amazing to me, how negative people do not know how to keep their mouths shut, and let others enjoy themselves.  I do pray that you and Robin find solace and some positivity in your business, which in my opinion can use some, and allow others to enjoy theirs.  Do not sell Longaberger product because you can, but because have something to say positive about everything from the products to the company itself.  If it wasn’t for companies, products would not be here in the first place.

I just feel like that at this time, I need to take a well-deserved break from this group.  I do advise that you find that peace, and remember that how excited you were when first started with Longaberger. I hope to see and meet some of you at the Bee in July.   Carrie, I am sorry that I am leaving this way.  You have been a wonderful moderator to me.  Good luck with all of your businesses.

Patricia Logan  

It was pretty straight forward.   This post shows how even with freedom of speech, which again we have the privilege of having in the US, how saying the wrong thing can hurt a person.  So on this Memorial Day Monday, as I said in the letter to the group, find that thing that make you happy and you feel good inside.  do not worry about any one else.  OK, if you are a parent you can worry about your child, but other that than that, find that peace that brings you joy and happiness, and contribute nothing but positive energy and words of kindness to someone who can use it.  I will do the same.

How's my writing...

I am not asking this question for you to give an analysis on the way I write.  I mostly write to relax (among other things I do to get ready for the evening ahead), clear my head, or to get things off my chest.  By now, if you have been following me on this blog, or any of my other blogs, I have sort of an observational point of view of looking at things and events.  I write what I see, and give you a play by play of what I think of it.   I think most writers write this way.  I  do not know what you call it.   Some of it is humorous, some serious, and while most are middle of the road.

For example, I wrote in my MDN Creates blog back in January 2012 about my 3-year old niece and her mouth.  As humorous as it may have sounded in cyberspace, I, nor my sister was laughing at the time, and since then I believe she is cured for now.  Nine'na is learning how to choose her words carefully.  However, clocking her brother, Deonte (who is 18 months older), or bossing her cousin, Leon (who is 23 months younger) she has a ways to go.  I may start trying to be funny, and end up serious, but not too serious.   My post on Whitney Houston is one example I wrote on this blog.   My informational pieces talks mostly about things that I hold near and dear.  These are things I want people to know about (my scrapbooking, how to achieve a nice scrapbook, organizing, and topics like being True to yourself).

The point I am trying to make is write what you know.  Somewhere out there, you have intrigued a person, who for some reason has not heard your point of view.  My point of views have never meant to be mean-spirited nor will they ever.  I wrote in my first post on this blog, that my point of views are just that, Point of views.  if you find yourself rethinking on how you approach something in your writings, by all means change it.  Sometimes I wonder if I sound like a senior citizen, LOL.   Well it is true, but when I think about the comments I read from the local newspaper articles, I feel like I am in good company.   After all, how would you see A person being careless about securing their belongs such as personal id's.  (This a hint for my next post: I saw a person in front of me in at Michael's Arts and Crafts making a big mistake, SMH)

Well, I need to get ready for the day ahead.  God Bless You.

Be true to Yourself and others...

...When offering a service they could use.  I am surprised by the number of people who actually claim they have a legitimate business.  I am not talking about people like me, who try to make an honest day's wage in the form of a home or small business, or even the ones who work for someone else.  You are fine.  I am talking about the people who claim they have some get rich quick business, in hopes that the get their "sucker born every minute person."  Sure, we all want money, that is the point of working, but it should not be to the point of robbing a person blind.  We all have valuable skills that can be used for the common good, but I could tell you of the countless people who flood my inbox on a daily, wanting my time, and my money so that I and others like me can line their pockets.  

Look, no one likes the idea of depending on the government to pay for bills, feed the family, and help find  and pay for housing.   If you have to depend on the government, that is fine too, but do it temporary.  During the time of dependability, gain some skills.   I know it is easier said than putting fourth an effort.  Some people think that asking for help are for the lazy and the dumb.  No it is not.  It is for people who need a little boost, until a person can find a better way of doing things.   For people who judge, you do not know a person's situation.  There maybe generations of people on welfare, but has anyone ever bothered to ask that family why they are on welfare in the first place?  Has anyone ever bothered to ask that young mother why she is pregnant for the 8th time.  If you were in that person's shoes (and we are all one paycheck from being there ), what services would you want someone to teach you?   Is it how to interview for a job?  Childcare needs?   Utilities?    Healthcare options?

For those of you who are currently on some type of assistance, what is holding you back for getting all that you want?  Is it pride?  self esteem issues?  Lack of skills?  Lack of resources?  Envy of others not necessary like you but of your race?  The lack of wanting to know a higher power who is bigger than all of us?   Hum, I think I might have struck a nerve here, but I am going to let you ponder that for a moment, and it is sometime to think about.

We all have something to contribute to this world if we all just stop and think about it.   For some reason, at least where I live, help stops at age 21-24, and for what?   There used to be a time where people are kind enough to offer help just to offer it, and people kind enough to except it.   Now there is this "don't touch me", "text me", "I do not want to speak to you", and "if you come near me, I will sue you" type mentality.  We have our head buried in the sand (cell phones, Ipad, laptops) to the point where even teens text each other when they are across the table from each other.   We talk, but we do the wrong type of talk.   Ponder that too, and I will catch you later.

Monday Morning being single and childless

Happy morning to you all.   I have no particular topic for this morning.  It is 7:28am where I live, and it a lovely May 7, 2012 day.  So far.  I have a really busy week ahead of me, that I am sure the Lord will bless me with.   When I woke up, I thought about my day, and what it will bring a single gal like me.  I do not have to get up, try to fix breakfast for myself, a husband, and kids.   If I had to do it all over again and choose my destiny, by now, that getting up, getting dressed, meeting my husband in the bathroom as he getting ready for work would have been a reality.   I would say that I miss it, but I never had it in the first place.  How can I miss something I never had?    Let me ponder that for a moment.

For you single ladies out there, no matter what age you are, Why are you single and how have you dealt with it up to this point?  For me, it was a little of choice, a little of career, and a little of "where are the men?"  I wanted it all.  I wanted to be one of the ones in the household bringing home the bacon.  My mother was at home for a while.  This was during a time when women stayed at home, while the husband worked, and women formed clubs to pass the time away, when they were cleaning, making dinner, washing something (clothes, dishes, children).  When they were not doing that, they were grocery shopping, mending, and as I said earlier, getting together with the ladies.  My father was in the Air Force (retired in 1979), so he flew a lot.  I have had my share of pachinko machines he would bring back from Japan.   When I was 12, my mom got her first job, at a fabric store.  There she became assistant manager, and I learned my first skill, inventory. Starting at age 16, I would volunteer to do inventory, and made a little bit of money for whatever I wanted.  It was easy, because I was the assistant manager's daughter, so you better not mess with me, at least so I thought.  She retired in 1995 from working in a home improvement center, but she has not stopped working.   She now works in the church, doing things such as food pantry and being a Christian Education chairperson (a position she has held proudly since 1980).  When she retired, she and my dad became foster parents, which is how I got my sister (My birth sisters are in heaven).

Yes, I still want to get married.  I love the idea of loving someone, and getting love back from them, which brings me to the point of children.  I am the only one in the family without a child.   The idea of physically giving birth ended at age 29 due to health issues, but I never said that I would not adopt either way.  I have not dealt with the news very well at times.   My brother has two boys, and my sister has a boy and a girl, and although I love being aunt to these four people (ages 16, 4, 3, and 1), I still long for one of my own.  Although, the child will not be growing inside of me they have,  however, been growing inside my heart for the last few years.

I am not saying that being single does not have its perks.  If I want quiet time, I turn off the television or radio.   If I really do not want to be bothered (and I have not), I do not answer the phone (although I make my parents worry).  The messes are mine (except my car in the backseat -its theirs, LOL, and I am still finding french fries from Mickey D's).   I still like Disney, and trying to take the family of 10 (4 adults, 2 seniors, a teen, and 3 little ones) in 2013.  I have my own business, and I can work up to 4 am if I want to without taking a break except to eat and go to the bathroom.  If I had hubby and kids, there would be the constant "honey could you do this", calling mommy for no reason (although it is hilarious when the kids scream aunty for no reason), boo-boos (hubby and kids), and the endless calls of "what's for dinner?".   So for those of you who are married (and you know who you are), ask yourself this question, "how would it feel to be single and childless?"  Consider yourself blessed with the fact that you have found someone, and that you can get up for those 2am feedings.  I consider myself blessed in all areas, single and childless or not, but I am still looking, and my baby girl (or boy) is not far, rather I marry or not.  I still enjoy working, and everyone would have to adjust to my present schedule, and me to theirs.  God Bless you on this day.

Teams

Hello-

I am sorry that I have not written in a long time.  To say I have been busy is a understatement, or an excuse, whichever works for you.

I want to talk about being part of a team.  Not necessary as is in "there is no I in team" for if you have ever been part of a team, you should know this, but when a person decides to select someone to be part of a team.  I think, I can speak for myself on this one, but I cannot.  When I ask a person if they ever considered being part of my team, I have already seen qualification which makes them a good team player.  That person may have seen it too, but never asked about being a consultant.  Once that person applies to be a consultant, only Longaberger can have the final say so in that process.  That task is very simple.   There is another type of team I want to talk about.

I mentioned this, because lately I have been trying to join a design team with someone.  A design team is a group of people who can take what the head person gives them, and turn it into their own creation.  There are graphic design teams (I cannot draw good enough to save a life), and scrapbook design teams.  I am trying to join a scrapbook design team.  These teams are, as I said, a group of people, who can take say a piece of paper, ribbon, a rubber stamp, and ink, and incorporate them into a scrapbook layout.  This is supposed to show the reader some ideas of what to do with items they have at home.   Some teams are the manufacturers who make the products (like Basic Grey, K and Co, and Bo-Bunny), while there are others who have blogs who are asking for  design teams as well.

Now I do good work, not great work, but good enough to be on a design team.  To be on a basic design team, you have know how to scrapbook or make cards.   You also have to know what they are talking about. some teams require you to have a blog, like one team that I am on, and for some teams, it is not a requirement. Some teams do not require you to be unique, while others do so, but all require you to be creative.  Bottom line, follow the requirements, and maybe you will get on team of your choice.   So far for me, 1 out of 10 I have applied for and actually made.   I only want one more, and it is dishearten when you think you are one of the ones to be selected only to be shot down.   Well, I applied to the next one, Prima, who makes Prima flowers and paper. The deadline is May 15, and I applied the day they announced it.  This is how bad I want to be on a design team.

Now since I mentioned my plea on this blog and not my scrapbooking blog, those of you who do not make scrapbook layouts or cards may wonder why put myself through things such design teams, when they do not pay a dime.   I do it for several reasons.  First of all, recognition.  I am not a famous person,my creations are not known, except through  several family members,friends, and those who read my blog, I have 170 or more followers.   Second, customers.  I plan to and want to make scrapbooks, cards, mini books, and journals for people.  I also want to teach classes on the subject.   This requires customers, paying customers.  After all, a girl's got to eat and pay bills. Lastly information.  Even though there plenty of information out there on scrapbooking, many still think of it as a way for a housewife or student to past the time away, when it can be much, much more.  There are people who would pay hundreds of dollars just for one scrapbook, and there are machines which can cut out designs for books, which can cost up to $500.   That is how serious this craft is.   I can go on.  People want to copy what you do when they run out ideas.  I also find it relaxing.

So for those who choice which person would make a good fit on your next team, whether it is a design team or something which you have to do for the boss.   Be careful on the approach and weigh each decision carefully.  Ask yourself what each person brings to table that is unique, but not too unique that you have to be picky about it.   Everyone has their own way of doing things.  Just give them the basics and just let them be if you pick them.  If they go so far out there until you cannot stand it, just reel them back in, tell them to focus, do not drop them.  Things will be fine at the end.  If it is only a year's commitment, it is only a year, then you get to pick a new bunch of people.  Again, it will be alright.