Friday, October 12, 2018

Facebook, day 1: How to conduct Yourself

(c) 2018
I love doing a type of posting called Serial Posting.  Serial posting is writing a series of posts covering the same subject for a short period.  Serial posting gives the reader little bits of information that may not get covered in a normal blog.  The writer may want to introduce the new subject as a way of telling
the reader that the blog may be changing sometime shortly.  My backstory of starting serial posting is (1) I have so much to say on a regular blog post, until it has to become a serial, or you will miss all of my cute little nuggets of information on the subject.  (2) I do not want to spend a lot of time doing them because there are tons of information that you can find on the interwebs (Internet) until you can literally spend a whole month researching, just my take on the subject, and (3) You have a one-stop introduction to a series.  I started doing some serial posting about two years ago, I did an overall series on organizing your closet on my now closed Simply Organized Crafts (which is now a Facebook-only page).  The first serial posting on this blog was an intense look into social media and the basic principles on how to get started.  I had the basic points of the series, and if you want to know more about the series, I will post some links below.  The other back story is for the video series I finished in August, it is aimed towards those people who already have an account, already sharing content, but not quite sure on what is the next step, or how to maximize their time and money with social media.
I started to turn this into a serial posting for a week, and I was going through my thought process, I decided to turn this into a Friday weekly post.  So, just like the journaling weekly series on Wednesdays, you will get an introduction to each social media platform, then when that part is over, I will have some weekly tips each Friday (hopefully) on the subject. 
For this round, I will focus on Facebook.  Humm, what to do on Facebook?  Well, you can post events, respond to other people’s posts, play games, post, including pictures, conduct business, and congratulate people. Even create or join a group.  That is about the size of it.  I will hit on each one of these topics as we go along.
What you cannot do (my opinion) is to curse (people do), belittle people (It happens), Spam (a big no-no for me and Facebook), and my personal favorite, trolling and threaten people.  Today’s topic will may hit someone in the gut, including mine.
Why go there?
Back in August, I found out on messenger, while looking at a friend’s message, that I was unsubbed from a blogging group without warning.  Maybe, it was I had not contacted anyone through Messenger that I was still part of the group.   I had so many things to do that week, such as find out when the funeral of a beloved church member and learning how to work the business end of P. Lynne Designs.  She had started group convos, which I could not keep up, as well as many other members, who were also booted from the group.  Was she being a little too snobbish?  Maybe, but my way of thinking was how in the heck am I supposed to do all the things that I am supposed to do for my business, not to mention, my family and friends when I am always answering group questions in messenger?  I started to write this nastygram about this group, and I stopped to think about what would happen if she read the message from my regular newsfeed, and told me to back the F---- off, I was not getting back in, and that was that?  I always have to keep my temper in check, and this is what I mean about trolls.  More about trolls in a minute.
Anyway, I erased what I was to say about this group, and I thought, “when I have the time, I can always ask to rejoin the group”.  Both tempers in check and she gets her way by removing the non-participates.  After all, it was her group, not mine.  I had one, and believe me, it is not easy to run one.
So, what is the proper way to deal with Facebook?
Simply answer:  be yourself, but not in such a way that if you have a nasty attitude, it comes off on your posts, your responses to your friend’s post and other things on Facebook.  You may share, and share often, but not in a way that lands you in Facebook Jail or having people unfriend you.  I might mumble and grumble while I am posting something that I may disagree with (not clicking the like button), but nicely put things, so that your friends see your POV (Point of View), and not come back with something nasty as well.   I will address this on Twitter, Instagram, and even LinkedIn.
So, now that we got of that out of the way, let’s talk about the elephant in the room, Trolls
I have talked about trolls until I am blue in the face, but it bears repeating:  If you disagree with something, do not like it and do not make a comment, in fact, just don’t.  Actually, I am now seeing more trolls on YouTube than any other social media platform. People are getting better about it, but I am still seeing some posts on Facebook, where people are posting (or reposting) cursing and basically belittling a post.  I usually exercise this basic rule:  If I do not like what is being said, delete it, shut the person up for 30 days (meaning you do not see their posts for a while), or unfriend them.  You do not have to explain, just get them off your newsfeed.  They do not have to unfriend you, and if they find out through a mutual friend, they do have the right to ask you (In-person) why?  Simply tell them.  Do not berate them, give a simple explanation.  If they explain that they are in a bad place in their life, tell them that you can be supportive outside of Facebook and that you are willing to listen.  At that time, you can simply explain to them your friend's situation, like why you unfriended them in the first place.  For me personally, I am a sensitive person and my father reads what I put on Facebook, and often questions my posts.  I am also friends with several former pastors.  Besides, you have to break away from Facebook (and any other media) because face to face contact is better anyway.
How would you like to play a game? (a quote from War Games (1983))
As a general rule, I do not play games until all of my work for the day is done.  Every once in a while, I may play one during the day, if I am waiting on something.  I do not allow people to invite me to a game, and I don’t invite my friends.  It is not important to play a game.  I also do not spend money on games.  If I run out of a move, need more virtual coins or points, the credit or debit card does not come out.  Why?  Because it is a waste of your money.  If you are on a budget (and most people should be raising their hand on this comment), or you need to pay for a bill, which is the last thing you need to run out of real money for because you need virtual money to build a building on SimCity BuildIt.  Not worth it.  Games are a time-waster as well.  So why do I play a game?  To blow off steam or to wind down.  I do not have any games promoting violence.  Why?  Because it can get into my psyche and make me think bad thoughts.  This is just me.  I do have to warn you, I do play a lot of eating games (Candy Crush, Cookie Jam Blast, or kitchen games where you have customers you need to feed and make money from).  Maybe this is the reason why I am always hungry, LOL.
Invites and Force Joins
Sometimes, when one of my friends has a new group, I do not mind receiving an invite.  It is to help out a friend or more importantly to support them.  I received two recently.  One from a close friend and a friend I barely know.  Both made me a member of their group.  As a general rule, I do not want to get an invite, and before I have a chance to look at your group, I am a member.  I decided to stay in both groups, but the one that I am not friends with in person, it was not supported for her, it was a support for all things business, and I was not very happy.  I may drop it at some point, especially since she is spamming my newsfeed all over the place.  Now, the other friend sort of did the same thing, but the difference is I know her in person, I know what her struggles have been through in the last few months with her health, and we talk a lot.  It makes a big difference to me.
Until we meet again….
So, with that being said, please do not force a person to join your group.  Yes, after you send the invite, it might sound good to that person to join, but let them join on their own.  I realize that I have 10 groups where the invite was sent, but I never joined. 
I will speak more on this and other topics while I am focusing on Facebook and other social media platforms.  In the meantime, I hope you have learned something a little more about Facebook in this post.   I will also cover Facebook Live, which for some reason morphed into Facebook Watch, sending messages through Messenger, and Facebook for Business, which is something I am learning myself since I recently joined it.  I will also touch on pages, personal and business, and spamming (the hacking and posting a post over and over again about a topic-trust me it is not pretty for neither one).  These are little nuggets of advice I want to give to you each Friday.

Next Friday, God bless you.

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