May you please go away

I am looking forward to June.  June is not my month, but it is close to my month.  July IS my month.  This is the month where my parents welcome their firstborn child, ME.  I will talk about June and July in their prospective months.  In the meantime, I hate to do this, but it is reflection time.

May the pandemic

Photo by Pixabay.com

There is no doubt that May continued the lockdown.  It wasn’t until May 16^th that things started to open back up.  Was it too soon? Probably, people are just too glad to get out.  To wear a mask or not wear a mask in my opinion is a personal preference.  I prefer to wear one for safety since I have to go visit my parents, who are elderly and sickly.  I have mentioned that in several of my posts as of late, and I am not about to change that stance soon. 

Because of my stance, I have postponed my family’s trip to Disney.  I have mentioned in a previous post that the trip that was canceled in October 2019 for a totally different reason and will not be rescheduled until July 1, 2020, for the date of December 2021.  I have other reasons too, including that Walt Disney World will not accept reservations until July 1, 2020, so I have no choice.

I have stepped into two stores since the state of Ohio opened back up. It was yesterday.  I had to get an air filter from Lowes and water from Dollar tree.  My air conditioner needed the filer and I needed some water to put into my toilets.  Why?  Because my water was shut off due to an outside pipe bursting from the winter thaw.  It started leaking the Thursday before, and from where the sound was coming from, I thought that it was the next-door neighbor’s pipe.  I ignored it.  I was going to take something to my parent’s house when I found a note on my back door.  I grabbed the note and showed it to my dad, who tried to see over the next several days on how to get the outside pipe, which was not in my fence.  To make a long story short, the water was shut off.  I could not bath, wash clothes, wash the dishes (thank God for being able to hide dirty dishes in a dishwasher), and found out that my attic is attached to my neighbor’s attic and only separated by a divider. Got to love the designer for these buildings.

My water is now turned back on.  It is in moments like these that allow me to respect outhouses😅.  Tip:  if you have a Dollar Tree or any dollar store, getting water from there for $1 is wonderful.  You can get $10 worth and store them in case of emergencies.  When the emergency is over, refill and save for next time.  The good news is water does not spoil.  If you feel uneasy about refilling the bottles, buy 10 more sealed new ones for $1.

The cat is in heat again. I tell you, I feel brand new when she does this.  Thank God she will be fixed soon.

May the activist

I do not have to tell you about what has been going on in the African American community and beyond.   It is another sad story of an officer overstepping his authority, and he put his own agenda over the person who he was arresting.  The man died, and it took the officer’s superior and department a day after George Floyd died to arrest the officer. At first, it was going to be just a firing. People started peacefully protesting, then it got out of hand from there. They are even protesting in my city. I found out that it is only an arrest for 3rd-degree murder.  If it had been the opposite, George Floyd would have been charged for 1^st-degree murder.  The officer needs to be charged for 1^st-degree murder.

I have or will have mentioned this in my last post, but I am tired. My people are tired.  When you see a photo of a tired person, it is of an African-American.  We have been down this road oh so many times until we cannot count anymore.  We do not have to be doing anything but going about our day, just living in the moment.  What do I mean by that? Let see:

·         Going to work

·         Sitting in the back yard

·         Going to the mailbox

·         Talking to a neighbor

·         Getting something to eat

·         Sleeping in our own home

·         Walking the dog

·         Going to the store for some skittles (remember Treyvon Martin)

·         Having an outing in the park

·          Add sitting in a car or having anything to do with a car (Sandra Bland and now George Floyd)

·         Enjoying a night of fellowshipping (the 9 that were killed in a North Carolina Church during bible study)

·         Jogging (Ahmad Avery)

I have a whole list of things that we want to do without some white person getting upset, calling the police, and wasting taxpayers money, and putting in false reports, or becoming a vigilante and take matters into your own hands.

This started well before these incidents.  There was:

·         The 1960s

·         Jim Crow

·         Sharecropping

·         Slavery

To name a few.  When will it end?

Now, I am not saying that all white people are racist.  I have some good, decent white friends who have my back.  Not all black people are cheaters and anything else that we are being accused of. I do not want to spend any more time on this than I have to.  I have started back my YouTube channel (I took a break from it), and I have addressed it there.

So, May was not a good month for me.  I want a do-over, but, I would then ask for a do over for a lot of months and years, including the months where I almost took my life, the times I did not get the job I wanted, the times I ran completely out of money and had to depend on my parents, and the times where I wished I was taking care of someone other than myself, only to find out that in one big swoop that ability was taken away from me.

Those disappointments were replaced and filled with great big moments of joy, happiness, “Yay, I got the job”, “yay, I have enough money to go on that trip or to buy something I really wanted”, and “yay, I am going to be an aunt and niece (or nephew), aunty is going to spoil you like nothing else matters, but I am also going to teach you something.  I cannot wait until the newest Logan is old enough for me to give her the same treatment that I gave her cousins, uncle, and father have gotten before her. Aww, heck, she gets it now.  I am trying to think of an outfit that will make my 3-month old niece look fly. (Oh, do they still say that?  Let me know in the comments section). 

It is times like these that keep a person on their toes and to remind us that everything is not always going to go our way.  I am trying different techniques like journaling, meditating, exercising, and being kind to myself and others.  Yes, these are angry times, and for that, I try not to watch too much news, pray about a situation, and try to take a positive approach, which includes trying to ignore the tyrant in the white house.  It is hard when your race has once again become the subject of white people acting ugly and black people responding ugly.  Find your happiness or calmness in the midst of this storm of illness and protests.  You will be surprised how much better you will feel.

Until then, I pray that June will be the start of something better for all of us.

Summer Saturday: Poetry

Happy Saturday Morning, everyone!

One of the African Dancers performing at my family
Reunion banquet last Saturday
(c) 2017 P.Lynne Designs

I know it is late, I have not posted in a while (August post coming soon, I promise).  I am not excusing the lack of posts, except it is summer.  OK, so it has been a couple of weeks since I posted anything, but again, it is summer. 

I have been to my family reunion last weekend, and if you follow me on Instagram (www.instagram.com/tricia721  same username as my Twitter account), I have posted a couple of pictures there.  Me and my family went back to Alabama, where both of my parents are from (remember, I am a Northern Baby, born here in Columbus).  My father had surgery but insisted on going. (Do you have men in your family like this?  All I can say is Uggh!!) My brother drove there and back.  My nephew, is at the typical age of 6, going on 7 at the end of the month (who actually is 17-year-old in a child’s body, LOL), was good.  Never complained, except a couple of times was a real trooper, being the only kid in the van.  We rented the van, a Chrysler Suburban, rides like a dream, and I had the pleasure of having the whole third row to myself.  My only wish was that I was put on the driver’s list of people driving (having only driven an SUV once). 

We stayed with my aunt in Madison, AL, 2 nights, the hotel the rest of the nights.  I am not going to tell you all of my adventures of last weekend.  Next stop…The Islands.

Why am I posting?  A Poem

This is a short post tonight.  I was trying to find something to write about.  Tip:  sometimes you have to let inspiration take control. 

I do not write poetry.  I probably can if I let inspiration take control of the situation and I am not patient on some things.  So tonight, I was reading a Facebook post, and a friend of mine found this poem about being a black woman.  I read most of it, and I thought, “where has this poem been all my life?”

It talks about what’s wrong with being a black woman.   I have often thought why I have to make an excuse for being born a black woman.  We are often the low person on the totem pole for benefits, pay, and other things.  People always think that when I am upset, I am going to beat a person up.  I am upset, how do you think I am going to react to something that was done against me?  I had an incident that blew up in someone’s face. 

I was getting off from work in December 2006.  It was the holiday season, and I am tired from working (my hours were from 3 PM-8 PM).  I was working at Archiver’s which was a scrapbooking/crafting store.  I walked to my car, and at the same time, two ladies were walking towards their car.  I had a tote bag with me and had put it on the passenger side of my car.   The driver of the other car looked at me and screamed, “you parked too close and you better not hit my car with that door”, or something to that effect.  I told her that I did not hit her car, and I was rushing to get to the driver’s side of my car.  She thought that I was rushing to hit her.  I was not paying attention to her at all.  She had threatened to call security on me.  Her friend tried to calm her down.  I was only trying to get away from her.  Now, I had a hard day, and I had parked the car in that spot 3 hours before I went into work, so I was in the mall area from 12 NN.  I had not moved my car, and I do remember that her car was not parked there before. So, in essence, she was in the wrong, but since she saw I was African American, she thought that maybe she would provoke me, to make a scene, which did not work in her favor.  Maybe she too had a bad day, not getting what she wanted from the stores she shopped at?  Who knows, all I know is I wanted to get home, decompress, and get ready for the night.  I found myself 5 minutes later, sitting on the side of the freeway, crying because this woman decided to pick on me and my spirit.  A freeway officer pulled up behind me and asked me if I was OK.  I told her “no”, and explained to her what happened in the parking garage.  She talked to me for a minute, and that was the best 2-minute conversation I had with a police officer.  She told me to take my time to compose myself before going back on the highway.  I stopped by my parent’s house before going home.   After leaving my parent’s house, I went home, took a hot bath, and forgot about the day.

I should never have to explain myself to anyone who is in the wrong.  I know that now and should never have said anything to that woman who was leaving with her friend.  I thank God that I kept my temper in check and security never came to her supposed rescue.

The Poem is called “What If I’m a Black Woman”.  It was written originally around 1996 and the author is unknown, but I imagine that is was a black woman who wrote it.  Enjoy reading it, and I will talk to you later.

What If I Am a Black Woman?

Is it a disease? Well, if it is, I sure hope its catching
Because they need to pour it into a bottle,
label it, and sprinkle it All over the people
men and women who Ever loved or cried,
worked or died for any one of us.

So...What if I am a Black woman?
Is it a crime? Arrest me!
Because I'm strong, but I'm gentle,
I'm smart, but I'm learning,
I'm loving, but I'm hateful.
And I like to work because
I like to eat and feed and clothe
and house Me, mine
and yours and everybody's,
Like I've been doing for the past 300 years.

What if I am a Black woman?
Is it insane? Commit me!!
Because I want Happiness, not tears;
Truths not lies; Pleasure not pain;
Sunshine not rain; A man not a child!

What if I am a Black woman? Is it a sin?
Pray for me! And pray for you too,
If you don't like women of color
because we are... Midnight Black,
Chestnut Brown, Honey Bronzed,
Chocolate Covered, Cocoa Dipped,
Big Lipped, Big Breasted, and BEAUTIFUL
all at the same time!

So what if I am a Black Woman?
Does it bother you that much because
I want a man who wants me...
Loves me and trusts me, and respects me
And gives me everything because
I give him everything back, PLUS!!

What if I am a Black woman? I've got rights,
same as you! I have worked for them,
died for them, played and laid for them,
On every plantation from Alabama to Boston and Back!

What if I am a Black woman?
I love me, and I want you to love me too,
But I am as I've always been,
Near you, close to you, beside you,
strong giving, loving,

For over 300 years, Your Black woman...Love me!

Now, enjoy a video I took of this group who performed for us last Saturday: