Motivational Monday: Self Doubt

As usual, from my Facebook status (I am starting to have a lot these days): “This is a retweet I shared about two years ago. I still feel the same as this person. I was raised to believe this and I will always carry this even I am about to draw my last breath. I also going through a period of uncertainty that reaches even before what happened over the weekend with Longaberger.

As a person, I am willing to stand by this company, but I need to be honest, I am not sure how long I am willing to do this. My first priority as an Independent Home Consultant is to take care of customer's needs. I hope the owners of this company know that. It is not what keeps them coming? New products can wait. If you cannot serve the general public with your service of provision, then maybe you should close your door for good. Yes, I am angry, and I am hurt. I may not have had many sales over the past few months with you and the reason was quite simple, I was dealing with self-doubt.

I had self-doubt in my abilities as both a consultant with a once upon a time billion dollar company and as a stationery/graphic designer/writer/crafter, trying to build a company from scratch. Why did I self-doubt? Simple, no sales, and no money to do promotions. I thought that by promoting on social media (especially my FB page) would get me sale from both Longaberger and my company, P. Lynne Designs. There were periods where I would just stare into the screen and wonder why am I doing this? I would hear the voice of God saying, "You got this", but I was not hearing it. Even when I did two projects last year for Judith Sharpe and Tiffany Thomas (which I still thank you both for believing in me), the doubt was still there. I still did not try hard enough to get the work I needed.

Two months ago, I made a decision to really get in there and push. That was when I accepted a scrapbook project from Pat Meadows that I can truly feel proud of (not that I was not proud of the other two projects from last year. I am finding my self-worth again, which is my long-winded speech of saying, self-doubt is a mood killer, a dream killer, and the devil's advocate. Do not give in.

One last thing: To all independent consultants, rather you are with Longaberger or with some other direct selling company, I decided back in 2010 to have another source of income. take those skills that you gained with the company, and use them to your advantage and have backup income. I am not saying leave direct selling, but have a secondary income, even if you have a spouse or partner. Like so many companies before Longaberger, you were told everything is fine, and then one day, you cannot contact the call center. I believe that Longaberger will return in one form or another, but now is the time to come up with a backup system. I can now understand why consultants ask to join another company. That is not what I am talking about. Use your skills as a consultant to maybe teach a class. having home parties have taught you to not be afraid of audiences. This is one example, and I am reposting this on my blog.

Never self-doubt your skills or your abilities to help others.”

It is pretty self-explanatory, this post.  It sums what I have been going through in the past few months, including why I have not been posting on a regular basis for both my blog and vlogging channel.  It comes from a quote from Twitter that I reposted in 2016 (my Facebook and Twitter accounts are linked):

Retweeted Melanie※ (@SimplyShayXO):

#ThereIsAlwaysRoomInMyLifeFor God. Even though the darkest time of my life, even when I pushed Him away, He was there. He is always there.

It is the post I just wrote that I want to focus on.  To give you a backstory, this is what transpired ever the weekend (without giving out company info because I still stand behind this company for their products):  I was told, along with other consultants and leaders to not put in any orders until further notice.  You can read into it however you want, I am not spilling tea yet until they officially declare bankruptcy, or I can go back to submitting orders for myself or other customers. You can get angry at other people without hurting the relationship, and at the moment, I am angry at owners of Longaberger.  Please note that I am also angry for and at the former owners of Longaberger. The reason:  for softening the blow of what was really going on with the company and why shield it from the sales force and the employees?  I am going to leave that question right there because the same thing was going on with Toys R Us, Sears (I was let go from two stores because I was in the dark of problems stemming from that fiasco), even my most recent former employer, Archivers. 

Most people blame Amazon and Walmart for their company’s problems, but I smell an even bigger problem, which is why I choose to stay out of company politics, but when you are messing with my money, my livelihood, you need to speak directly to me.  Longaberger owners JRJR Enterprises was not speaking to the sales force loud enough, long enough, and early enough to say there were problems.   Actually, I take that back.  I did receive an email, stating for everyone to increase their sales, but they did not say why.  I thought it was them encouraging you to increase sales, like a normal motivational talk, not a “we are losing sales” talk.

So back to the whole reason for this post.

I was thinking about my reason behind the post on Facebook, other than this post resurfaced (which is a good thing), and I was in that funky feeling.  It was the kind of feeling that you were happy but not that happy.  That is one thing that Facebook is famous for, to remind you of your post.  I am the type of person who posts what I have to say on social media and leave it at that.  A post.  Like others, I do post what makes me angry, but I have calmed down my anger over the past few months, since some people pay attention to it, and sometimes they do not.  I do not post to get a reaction anymore.  If it is inspirational I make it a point to have my Facebook friends (and Twitter and Linked-in friends since the accounts are linked) to read it.  I want to make sure that you know where I am coming from, and I do not like posting junk, which is the reason behind me not posting when I get a high score on a game.  I want people to learn and be inspired by my experience.

I want you to feel loved.

I want to solve the problem that you are having.  That is the whole reason behind P. Lynne Designs, my stationery/scrapbook company.  Let me give some examples:

• You want to capture that moment when you first went to Barbados.  You decide to go on a cruise and you decide to take a lot of pictures.  Now, you may not think that a scrapbook album is an answer to everything memorable, but it is.  You can put in more than photos.  How about that ticket stub to a benefit concert put on by Rihanna, who happened to be visiting her mom, and it was for a neighboring school that she attended when she was a child.  Or the first time you tried rum punch. How about on the Lido deck? The program from that concert? 
• You need flyers for an event
• You need an article about the on-going effects of global warming or how to make canvas wall art.
• You need wall art.

Yes, this is how I give of my talent, but I cannot give if I am constantly doubting if the client is going to love it or not.  I need to trust my instincts more.  I love the way I see things, which is with an open-mind that says that the world is more than one way.  So far, my clients have loved my work.  I get results. 

This also brings me back to you, and my takeaway from this post. 

What is your talent?  You do not have to be a good artist, singer, dancer, or speaker.  Listening can be a talent.  Listening with the intent of offering good advice can be a talent.  Chad Raider, Youtuber from GabeBabeTV is a known baby whisperer.  Every time a baby is near him, they calm down, which has worked so far on the newest member of their own family, Reagan Elizabeth.  Know this, if people turn to you because you can make the best Mac and Cheese that can beat a 100-year-old recipe, that’s talent.  If someone says that you can light up a room with your smile, that’s talent.  Talent does not always be a physical thing.  It is your mood, your attitude, your very presence.  In other words, confidence can be a talent as well.  Being modest without being overbearing is a talent.  Patience is a talent.  Find that talent, and never self-doubt it.

Reflections on Black History

(c) 2016 image by Google

February will be ending at the stroke of midnight tomorrow night. A new month will emerge called March. I want to take the time to reflect on this month. The reason why I want to reflect on this month is because of recent events that have happened within the past 5 years.

Now I can see many of you mumbling under your breath “here we go again, she’s got another one.” No, it is not that kind of a post. I just want to reflect that’s all.

It has to do with a sermon I heard my minister say today. It is all about the phrase, “Young, Gifted, and Black.” In case you are wondering about that phrase, it was actually a poem by Nina Simone, who also turned it into a song called, “To be Young, Gifted, and Black.” This song was written in 1969, and it talks about how beautiful to be young, gifted, and black. What she talks about in the song is the whole world was waiting to see how talented billions of boys and girls are. To me, this song reflected on how I should be, even though I did not quite understand at 4 years old.

Today, as I listened to the lyrics of that song at 51 years old, I fully understood what those words meant, as my minister read them from the pulpit. Sometimes, you have to read between the lines in order to understand a song that was written so long ago. My understanding is that I should be proud of what I have accomplished so far in my life. But more importantly, I should be proud of what my race has accomplished before I was born, and after I was born. What I also understood and those lyrics is that we should never let someone, thing, or idea hold us back. This is both as individuals and as a race of people, who has felt like they were held back for a very long time.

Do not wait for permission. What I meant by waiting for permission is you do not need anyone’s permission to learn, to research, to think, and to do (within reason) good things, in order to make this world a better place to live in.

I never had a problem with the #blacklivesmatter movement. It is a worthy cause towards ending racism once and for all. I do not have a problem with protest, when it’s done right, but there have been several incidences in the past 3 years since the protest, where protesting did not work for the common good. Is it really necessary to burn down buildings, loot, beat, and call people a name that hurts and maybe scar a person for life? No, it really is not necessary to do those things, and much more that have been seeing on the television, and read online. I agree with some people who say that all lives matter. So to me, there should be a protest where all lives matter, no matter what.

“But, you are on their side.” No, I am not. I am on the side where Jesus says to accept everyone, no matter what they look like, act like, or economic situation. This also includes those who do not have the same lifestyle as you.

One last thing before I end this post. Do not honor black history in just the month of February. There are so many accomplishments that black people have contributed to in the past. It doesn’t even boil down to that. When you think of it, there are so many talented young people who have lots to contribute with their talents. It is up to us as older people, and I’m talking about adults over 26 years old and older, to steer them in the right direction. If you know of any resources where a young person can steer their talents at, such as community service, then show them. Don’t just show them, take them by the hand, and lead them in that direction. You never know how that person will turn, which I hope will be a valued member of society.

“Young, gifted, and black does not mean they are thugs, rappers, drug addicts, and dropouts”, as my preacher said today. It means that there is potential, great potential in that head of theirs, if they were guided in the right direction. Here’s to February.