Renewing old habits

I am renewing something that I use to do.  It is a habit that I almost took up religiously.  I had a very distinct routine, and dare I miss one day of it.  The good news is that it was good for me, and I loved every minute of it.  You want to know what it is.   Well wait for it…wait for it…still waiting for it?

OK….

It is tap dancing.  Yes, if you have been following my blog for a while, you know I took ballet and jazz, but I am a tapper also.  I will not say used to, because once you are a tapper, it never leaves you.  The only problem is the last pair of tap shoes is a size 4 ½ and I am a 6-6 ½.  They tell you when you are fitted with tap shoes that your shoes need to be a half size bigger than your street shoe size.  I am sure that I will be comfortable wearing a size 6 ½ shoe size, because my feet are also narrow width, not average width.

Now you may be wondering why I decided to renew this habit.  Well for one thing, it is good exercise.  It increases the blood flow, and tap dancing is like running.  Once you get the combos together (and I thank the YouTube tappers for that), and your heart is racing.  At one point, I had an athletic heart, if you can call it that, because once you flap, shuffle, piddle-diddle, and wing yourself into shape, you heart rate is that of a runner.  I have developed high blood pressure since my last performance as a dancer (all three types) at Susie’s Dance Studio, I had to ask my doctor if it was ok, and of course she said yes.    I am just taking it in strive as I renew my habit. 

My first song I am dancing to is Uptown Funk by Mark Robinson, featuring Bruno Mars.  I could turn it into a jazz contemporary number as well.  I am not sure about it being a ballet number yet.  I am not auditioning to be on So You Think You Can Dance any time soon. There are no other dance competitions I can go to, and since Abby Lee Miller is not excepting adults, I think I will stay at home, unless I decide to try the exercise place in the next town that offers a class, which uses the ballet barre.

Follow up to Happy Ballet Day (Feb. 7) and other things

photo by Crystal and comp

First of all, this is one of those across the board comments.  I do apologize for not responding to all of your comments.  They are so kind and sweet.  I am so glad that everyone appreciates the art of dance and know what they can or cannot do.  

I just want to let you know that ballet was not the only dance form I took as a child.   I also took Jazz and Tap.   Jazz allowed me to get off of the pointe shoes, and with tap, hey, I like making noise, LOL.  If you think I was finished, I also took piano and organ lessons as well. Toss in a few Girl Scout and youth meetings, school choirs, and I was a busy girl.  I did not have the time to get bored and do nothing.  I also had chores to do.

If you guessed today’s post, then yes, it is all about keeping your children busy.   I am just going to say it right now, folks. For the most part, today’s children are lazy and rude.  No respect for people, rather they are their friends, family, or the lady sitting 5 pews from the pastor.   You ask them to do something, and they give you 15 “excuse me, are you talking to me, I hope you are not, because I will cut you” looks.  It does not have to be that way.  Here is the reason why.

I think sometimes we as adults have forgotten what it was like to be a child or a teen.  They get frustrated, and they do not know what the protocol is for many situations.  It is hard to keep up.   I could remember as a child, that anyone over the age of 20 was called Mr. or Ms. first name or last name would be preferred.   An adult has to give you permission to speak.  In fact, it is preferred that you were not in the room during “grown folks” talk.  Chores were done, music and dance lessons were practiced, homework was done, and family prayer time was done, all before play and television.  I did not have a television in my bedroom until I moved into the condo I live in now, and only because my father thought that I needed a bigger TV for when he and my mom came over.  The old analog set is in the bedroom.  another rule was I needed to be in before the street lights came on, or I was in for a rude awakening.  Finally, I did not get to watch television or go out to play if they had to tell me more than once to do my chores, get my homework, practice, acted out in public, or got into trouble in school, such as a bad grade or was sent to the principal’s office.  This was a one or two-week thing, depending on how severe it was.

Because of all the rules in my parent’s house, I dared not disobey them, but my parents loved me despite of.  I got swatted once, for breaking my brother’s baseball trophy, and still missed Luke and Laura’s wedding on General Hospital, because I was not allowed to watch.  I was on punishment for it. (Made that up when GH had their 50^th anniversary on the Soap channel a few months ago). I got mad at him and threw down the trophy.  So it was no accidental feat, I wanted to.  In the 8^th grade, I hit a girl with my purse in school, because I thought that she and another girl was talking about me.  I talked my way out of the suspension to one day, but to my father, it was not the end of the story.  Two weeks, no television, and the only time I got to go outside was if we were going somewhere. I missed two episodes of The Bionic Woman that I really wanted to see (made that up by watching them on the Syfy channel years later).  

The point I am making is today’s kids have it made with all of their phones, iPads, game stations and such, or do they?  Parents have to learn when to say no to a child who wants a Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube account.  There has to be a limit somewhere, and this is coming from a person who is just an aunt.  I feel like I am more than just an aunt, because I see how my nephews and niece operate.  They are 18, 6, 5, and 3, and they all have different personalities.  When they raise their voice or do not listen to me, I let them know that it is wrong of them to do it.  I have not swatted anyone but once.  Nephew, who is now 18, was climbing on my grandmother’s couch.  Both I and my mom told him to stop, but apparently it did not set well with him, and I swatted him with my hand.  He had on a diaper, and told me that it did not hurt, so I sat him in time-out.  He was mad at that point, but he had to learn not to climb.

I will be coming to a close by saying something that I say in my Happy Ballet Day post:  you have to know your child.  Do not just throw your child in an activity and expect them to fall madly in love with it right away.  Rec centers are wonderful for that, and many of the people who commented

have said that they do utilize the rec centers as a tryout tool for a dance, music or sport activity.  These activities in a normal setting are expensive, and there are some inexpensive things you can do with your child as well:

• Free museum day
• Run in the park
• Teach them what you know, but put it to their level.
• Take a bus ride if you are always driving.  This is great for them to learn the city and it saves on gas too.
• Go on a walk
• See if there are any child-friendly tours in the city (behind the scenes)
• Interactive stuff
• Blowing bubbles with dish soap and a common object.
• See if the local dance, music, or art company will allow your child to visit for a couple of hours,

These are only a few things that you can do with your child.  Have fun, and do not be hard with them.  When you do, do it out of love and tell them that it only helps them to be a better person and show respect for one another.   Be blessed.

Happy Ballet Day (February 7)

Photo By Balletclassroom.blogspot.com

I want to wish everyone, young and old, male and female, the fit and unfit this celebrated time of national ballet day.  As I sit here, I needed a little inspiration to get me something to write about, when I looked in my phone and opened a little-known app called Checkiday.  It tells you what national day it is.   

I believe there are two types of little girls....the ones that want to be all girly and the ones that are not.  Neither type is a bad thing, because it fits whatever personality that little girl wants to be.  I wrote something similar back in 2012, I believe, and it still holds true today.  Everyone is an individual, but that does not mean that you cannot be part of a group. In fact, team building is a very important skill.  I will tackle that another day.

So what is National Ballet Day?  It is a day of celebrating all things ballet.  Now folks, I am not suggesting that you all run to the nearest dance store, grab a leotard, some tights, a tutu, or 2, some pointe shoes, and strut your stuff.  Not everyone is a graceful ballet dancer.  (Guys, you may want to skip the tutu part, or not, I am not stopping you).   It take years of discipline to do this.  Trust me, I should know. 10 years is all a girl can take, and now my feet cry when I see a pointe shoe.

(This is a pointe shoe, up close and personal)

You start from ages 3-7, learning the basis or technics of all things ballet.  If some of you who watch Dance Moms think Abby Lee Miller is bad, think again.  She is mild compared to a straight-faced, technique-driven, no-fat on the body ballet teacher.  These teachers are not a needs-to-win-every-competition like Abby does.   They are performance driven and you have to eat, drink, and breathe ballet.   They do not want you to take up any other form of dance either.

Once you get your basis down to a science, guys still do demi-pointe (or tip-toe) work, while the girls rise to the occasion (get it), to begin preparing for pointe work.  There are pointe tests to make sure you are ready for the challenge.  They are technique and the strong feet test (you do know your feet and ankles have to be very strong, right?).  I do not know the actual name of these tests, I just know they are there.   I am going to stop here, because it will take at least over a thousand words or more to explain, and frankly, time is money.  I do have a few tips:

• You do not have to start at age 3.  I personally do not recommend it.  Why?  Dance needs to be something fun for your child to enjoy, not loathe by age 13.  Some children start at age 7 and in pointe shoes by age 12, but you have to know your child.   A good dance mom (or dad) listens to her (his) child.  If your child is crying while they do their first recital, pull them out of dance for the next year and let them sit it out during that time.  This will give the child a chance to “miss it.”  If they mention dance while absent, put them back in, but have a discussion first.  Do not keep pulling them in and out of dance class.
• The best way to start a child out is use the recreation center.  If you are going to an actual dance studio do your homework.  Ask about all the fees up front, dance schedule, how elite classes are run, and about contracts. 
• Most studios do have fees for costumes, concerts, and other outings.  Do not join if you do not have the time nor the commitment to do so.

Otherwise, have fun, dance the night away.  If you love to dance, but do not want the discipline, there is always the rec center, and they are not that big on technic at all.  Happy Ballet Day everyone!!!!

Dance Moms, Abby Lee Miller, and the world of dance: My Review

1, 2, 3, kick, and turn 2, 3, 4.  These are the words that come out of the mouths of all dance teachers teach, from the time a child starts taking dance at the age of 2 or 3 years old, until that person says no more.   Some take it for fun, while others take dance in hopes to have a career out of it. 

I wanted to write this review for a long time, but I hesitated.  My reasons are simple…I am a former dancer.   Every year since the age of 23, when I was told by my father that I needed to get a real job, I have wanted to get back into dancing.  As a child and into my teens, I took jazz, ballet, and tap.   I loved every minute of it and I could not wait to come to dance class.  It wasn’t that my life at home was bad, but I could not wait until I learned some new move, or enhance a technique that I was having problems with.  The following review are the problems I have with the Abby Lee Miller Dance Company, and the sensation known as Dance Moms.

About October or November of 2011, I was sitting in my office/living room turning the television.  I had grown tired of the police shows, comedy shows, and yes even the cooking shows.   To me on that day, I thought that television had gone to pot (as my grandfather used to say-still do not know what that means).  I turned to the Lifetime Channel (my favorite movie channel) to see if there was a movie on that I have not seen.   I got to the channel, and saw this fat lady (yes ladies, Abby is FAT), SCREAMING to the top of her lungs at these tiny young ladies in the middle of the dance studio.   I thought, “Wow how mean of her.”   I started to get intrigued with this overweight dance teacher.   First of all, NONE of my dance teachers never looked like that.  My teachers were fit, and trim, and can actually do the dance routines they gave me.  

As I watched this show, the camera quickly turn back to the moms in their little room they sit in while waiting on their budding dancers.   Instead of talking about how they are going to have a little powwow with Miss Abby for berating their child, they were talking about each other.  One person did something the other mom, and she was not right for doing so.   I thought, “OK, I get it, another reality show gone wrong.”  After the class, none of the moms threatened to yank their child out of the studio to let them take a class at another one.   Here is a tip for you first time dance moms:  When your child’s teacher yell her or him for dancing on the wrong foot, or keeping them out past their bedtime 2 days before composition, and has no regard for schoolwork; run as fast as you can with your child behind you, go to the nearest authorities, and go to a studio where the children are treated with respect.   The last screamer I have seen on television was Kate Gosselin, and I will not get started on her.

As for Abby, herself, I have a list of things I find wrong with in addition to the weight problem.   First of all, what person in their right mind would have a dance studio without, I repeat, WITHOUT former dance training, AT THE AGE OF 14?  Abby said this herself on The View two weeks ago; in fact one of the Dance Moms was one of her first students at the age of 2.   Abby does not like to lose or make second place.  She likes pushes the envelope when it comes to the student’s costumes or the dance number.   It has to be skimpy or controversial.  Nothing is too good for Abby.  I also not like that she has a 7 year old dancing with 9-12 year olds.  The child, McKenzie cannot handle the load that the rest of the dance class has.  The only reason why the child is there in the first place is her sister, Maddie is in the class.  Abby even told the child once to stop crying, because it does not look professional and it shows that she will be “difficult to work with”.  She’s 7, and if a child that young does not get a routine, or does not feel like dancing, do not force the issue, lady.    However, I do like the fact that she does get results, no matter how bad it is. Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention, Abby has this pyramid thing.  It determines on how good everyone was for the week.   It also determines if a kid gets a solo or not.   Oh give me a break.  I am so glad I did not have to go through that.

I blame the moms on this.  As I said earlier, the moms are sneaky, conniving, and backbiting.   One mom, Jill, left the studio behind Abby’s back to take her child to a rival studio in the show called, Candy Apples Dance Studio.   Another mom last week, Chloe’s mom, forgot her name, allowed her daughter to dance in a commercial for Candy Apples, only for her dance solo to be cut in the final commercial.  All Abby said was, “serves her right for not telling me Chloe was doing the commercial.”   “I would have stopped her.”  These people act worse than the children. 

So why do I watch this show?  Maybe I was looking for something to replace Kate Plus 8.   Not a chance.   Of course, I could be replacing one screaming idiot for another, and there are 8 girls in the elite dance group.  Perhaps it is to learn what not to do when placing my soon to be adopted child in either karate or dance class.   I do want my child to be treated with respect by other children and adults.  Maybe I watch it to inform those who are thinking about place their budding dancer or baseball player, the do’s and don’ts of teaching a child, or they are thinking about teaching a child something, that children (and most adults) do not respond well with the screaming, the ranting and the putdowns that another person gives. Giving positive feedback always works at the end of the day.   It did for me, rather I was at dance class, doing schoolwork, taking music lessons, or even now when I make something nice for someone, or give a complement myself.  That does not mean that the child needs correction.  It means saying it in a way that a child or an adult would understand.   In my dance or music lessons, that would include showing me how to correctly do a Grande Pirouette in the second position or how to correctly execute a E¨ dim chord on the piano. If I ever got yelled at, I would shut down and not do it at all.  Who knows why these reality shows are watch.

Give me your opinions about it.   I have giving you mine.   It could be anywhere from “I love this show”, “Abby and the kids are great”, to “Abby should not be running a studio” and “the Moms are all whack jobs, who have nothing better to do”   All I know is the day that I meet someone like Abby Lee Miller, a woman with no real dance experience, and no children of her own, I will run far, far, away with my child behind me.   Dance shoes and all.  5, 6, 7, 8, and turn.