Day 4: December 4, 2015- Joy at Christmas

(c) 2015 P.Lynne Designs

I have been told on several occasions throughout my life to find joy and happiness, but what are these things that people talk about?  Sure, I know the meaning of the two, but these definitions to me vary between person to person.  Some find it in things.  Others find it in money.  But I want to talk about the last part, finding it within yourself.  I know it is hard to find it in yourself, especially with all of these shootings, such as the most recent happening in San Bernardino, CA.  I have often talked about that city

because I spent ages 3-9 living there.  I do not want to focus on that right now.

My focus is finding happiness and joy, especially during this time of the year.  Christmas can do two things to a person.  It can either get you in the mood of giving or in the mood of receiving.  One of the ways of finding happiness and joy is the first way, giving.  It does not mean busting the piggy bank wide open and buying out the store.  Time is another way of giving.  When you focus on a person that has less than you, it should make you feel better in knowing that made a difference in a person’s life.

A person could have less than you in things, care, and love.  I want to focus more on something that does not require me to opening up my wallet.  I want to take the time out to show a person that I care and that I want to show love to that person.  I will be doing that for the long haul hopefully soon by adopting a child. For now, for the month of December, I can do that by helping with food baskets at my church, show more patience with the people who work in retail or driving, or simply spending time with someone who needs it. 

Today, I actually put change in to help feed the hungry while paying for my drink at Whole Foods.  I am not saying it to brag, that is not the point to finding joy and happiness.  I feel blessed in knowing that my little $.80 will go towards the food banks, and it could have easily gone into my piggy bank for my Disney trip next year.  I also feel blessed that I can take trips, adopt, or simply warm my feet in a warm home when many do not have that luxury.  In case you are wondering on what gives me joy and happiness, let me give you a little sample of what I mean:

·         My family

·         My friends

·         Breathing

·         Moving around

·         Being independent

·         My business

·         My creativity

·         The ability of putting a smile on someone’s face

·         Knowing that I am God’s child and that He loves me.

See, not one of them mentions things, except my business.  This is the top of my long list of things I am happy about and I find joy in.  Others include my love for dance and music, Disney, paper crafting, reading, cooking, computing, Christmas, Easter, writing, animals, children, movies, clothes and shoes.

I challenge you to find what makes you happy and gives you joy this Christmas season, and then care it throughout 2016.  Who knows, that joy and happiness will get so embedded in you until you hardly notice why you are happy all the time.

Blogmas Days 1-3

It is 2 mins before 12-midnight in Ohio, USA.  That is Eastern Standard Time.  I have not been so behind in my life.  I take it back I am always behind.  So you are getting a 3 for, that is 3 for the price of 1.  I should not get behind in my posts again I am just getting warmed up.  I have the whole month of December to do.  As they say, here we go…

December 1, 2015:  My Thanksgiving holiday and family.

(c) 2015 P. Lynne Designs

This past weekend, I spent time with family, and it was wonderful.  I do not want to talk about what I did, other than riding with my mother and father to Pigeon Forge, TN to a bunch of cabins just a stone’s throw from Dollywood the Amusement Park, or going to see Creed with my cousins (I will give a review later).  One of my aunts is a travel agent, and she is the one who found these cabins.  This is my mother’s side of the family, which consists of 9 brothers and sisters (2 are deceased).  All but 3 siblings made it up to the cabins along with most of their children (I was the only one who went with my parents, the rest had to work- the idiot employers).   My father had his gathering in the summer with his sister and my cousins from that side of the family.  Both I and my mom made Mac and Cheese for the Thanksgiving table.  My first time and they all survived, LOL.

We left last Wednesday and came back Sunday.  I love all my family from both sides of my family, but I feel like I am a little bit closer with this side.  I think the main reason is we do not fight, we have friendly disagreements, and it has been that way all of my life.  I have not once seen my grandparents fight, my mother had her usual sibling disagreement with her brothers and sisters, but if you have siblings, you know what I mean.  My parents have been together for almost 55 years (come next July), and not once did I ever hear either one of them threaten the other for a divorce.  My father has never struck my mother unless it was playful hitting (I call them “Love Pats”.) Sure, I do have a couple of aunts, uncles, and cousins who have gotten divorces (there is always one in every family), but they have found someone who manages to be their soulmate.  I have one aunt and uncle who are widows.  One who wonder why I have not found anyone.  Still looking.  OK, stop it, Patricia, focus on the subject.

I find that we are a very loving family, full of talent, and very inspirational.  We inspire each other.  We support each other.  We have all instilled the love of God and Christ Jesus in us.  Even if there are some of us who do not go to church, we all know who holds our tomorrow, and who we can count on.  During this time was the first time I was able to talk about that I would be starting adoption procedures with any member of the extended family, and it felt good.  Tip:  when something like that happens, you know it is the right time to do whatever it is you are trying to do.  Speaking of support, it is time for topic #2….

Day 2: December 2, 2015-  Black Friday shopping

This is sort of a touchy subject for people, especially people who love to shop.  First of all, I am not a Black Friday shopper, AT ALL.  Period.  Noda.  Not going to happen.  I applauded all of you who weather the shopping storm this past Friday.  Kudos to you and yours.  I have several reasons for not going shopping on Black Friday:

·         I do not want to move out of my comfy bed.  Even though I was not in my actual bed, that cabin bed was nice, warm and toasty.  Now why would I want ruin that moment for 52” television set at Walmart for $142 (before taxes)?  By the way, you do know that price was jacked up so they can get it down to that price, and still be able to make you believe you have a bargain.  Just thought you should know.

·         Fights.  People act like they have never bought anything, ever in their life (by the way, that was a double negative…. A no-no).  If you want to see the fights to not get you in the mood for next Black Friday, Google “Black Friday Fights 2015” on You Tube.  I bet you will not go to Black Friday 2016.  The sales are not worth spending a night in jail, getting a concussion for a blender when you have 10, or auctioning off your first born for an item that only works for 2 minutes.

·         Did I mention my comfy bed?

·         The stores are so desperate now, they have extended the sales to include Thanksgiving night.  Thanksgiving night?  Has everyone lost it?  I read a quote that said, “you are a hypocrite if you give thanks for what you have, then fight over something you do not need a few hours later”. It is true.  We have become a bunch of greedy Americans, and this is just the beginning.  

·         Not only that, you are taking people away from their families who have to work retail on Thanksgiving day.  Yes, I know that has been the norm in the military and other service areas, but I look at it this way:  You cannot keep sickness, fires, crimes, or terrorists away for the holidays, BUT you can step away from a $5 sausage maker that normally costs $25 for a day.  Have some common sense people.  

These are just a few of the many reasons why I did not, nor will I ever go Black Friday Shopping, but that does not mean I cannot participate in Cyber Monday.

Day 3:  December 3, 2015- Decorations hung by the chimney with care….

…. In hopes to take a $85 electric bill to $400 this year. 

I love lights. Pretty Christmas lights.  I also love Christmas Trees, and I love how everything is so sparkly and new.  I also love to stay frugal with my utilities.  Answer this question….

How in the heck does one start decorating in July, and light up the neighborhood by December 1?  No, I am not the person to do it.  Where does a person even save up enough money to buy all the equipment (computer, lights, blowup things, etc.…) and then use all electricity their little meters and breakers switches can muster?  I am in a rental, and even though the electric is in my name, I cannot see myself going from a cushy double-digit bill to one that constitutes a car note payment. 

Instead, I leave it up to the experts:  Disney World, The Columbus Zoo, and any lights my condo complex decides to put up to name a few.  They have a set pattern that works.  For example, Disney knows exactly how many lights will light up Cindy’s castle (Who I understand was evicted by Elsa for a Frozen Castle wonderland-only in Florida).  They know how to light the resorts, the rides, even Main Street.   The bill is huge, but it is in the budget, and I am sure the cities of Kissimmee, Orlando, and Orange County will make sure they pay their fair share.  Let me have a late bill, and AEP will have my head on a platter and serve it breakfast, lunch, and dinner.  They have Mickey’s Very Merry Christmas Party, where you walk around, eat cookies, and drink hot chocolate.  Of course, you get to ride as well.

The Columbus Zoo is in the same boat as Disney.  They currently have Wildlights at the Zoo, and I had a chance to go two years ago with the youth group from my church, and it was beautiful.  You really do not see the animals, except for the ones who can take the night life.  You walk around to see the displays, drink hot chocolate, kids make crafts, and see Santa and Mrs. Clause.  There is also a carousel there as well.  I really enjoyed it all, and I want to go back to take my niece and nephews.   Next year, I hope to see Disney’s Christmas lights.

So, for all you people who enjoy lighting up the neighborhood for 1-2 months out of the year enough for the space station to spot you from above, I applaud you.  Have fun.  I hope you did not fall off the ladder trying to string your one millionth light in place.  Have fun, don’t worry about the bill now.  Just pay it, because this is what you chosen to do each year like clockwork.  When people like me drive by, and admire your work, feel proud that accomplished what you wanted for your family, friends, and strangers alike.  I just chose to decorate on the inside, with my tree, knick-knacks, bake cookies, and cakes.  It not about how you decorate, just know who you are celebrating as you do everything.

Merry Blogmas 2015

No, you are not reading a typo (even though the great grammar police will want you to think that).  I have not gone off my rocker.  I am a perfectly sane person today and proud of the title, even though it is not mine that I created. 

I am ending my reign on Blogger.  Yes, I know, it is bittersweet, and I have my reasons, but I must move on.  Before I go (which will be January 2016), I thought that I would give you one more round and a taste of what is to come for My Ambiance Life 2.0.  (I actually like the sound of that).  All this month in December, I will be giving you a taste of what I hope is an annual event, Blogmas.  It is also called Vlogmas, which is the video version of Blogmas.  Anyway, it is quite simple…. I give you a series of blog posts which are a random thought.  The post does not have to be to the theme of the blog, which is all about writing, but they do have to tie into the holidays in some way.  So, they are writing prompts really.   I do not have a list this year because I just decided to do this, and a good way to end my reign on Blogger.  

I have also done a bad thing, I missed my first day, but no fear, because the beauty of this Blogmas, is if I miss a day, I will just double up, or triple up (which I hope I do not get to the point of doing).

I do ask that I have a little of audience help.  When you read this, please either “Like” and comment on my Facebook page, or if you do not feel like it, at least do the writing prompt.

So now that I have your attention, I hope you like my “Blogmas” writing prompts, and as I get closer to the time of announcing where you will find My Ambiance Life after December 31^st, I will let you know.

Babies watching babies

(c) 2011 P. Lynne Designs

Status report from my Facebook page….” Sad news and a question. I was reading trends a few moments ago, and this is one of the reasons why I don't need to read nor see the news, but a 19-month old died in Houston, TX, because her siblings (two 3-year-olds) put her in the oven and she was severely burned. The oven was on. Now my childless self-wanted to know what was so damn important (sorry for the language), that the mother and the boyfriend had to leave these 4 children alone in the house? Nothing was that important. Ladies, unless you are passed out on the floor, there is NO REASON to leave a child under the age of 12 along in the home. NO REASON. if it is that important, CALL A BABYSITTER OR RELATIVE to watch your kids. Heck, take them to a police or fire station. Anything just does not leave them at home alone. Kids are too smart for their own good these days. Having them sit in front of a television set or computer while you are out for 5 minutes or longer does not cut it for these kids. There is so much stuff for a child to get into. You cannot have a baby watch a baby. There is a blog post coming, so I will continue my rant there. Be blessed.”

This is probably one of the hardest blog posts I have written on My Ambiance Life.  It comes with sadness, because I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I am a compassionate person, among my many flaws.  It is a flaw that I proud to have, and I feel that this is one of my character strengths, but it also comes with a price, I cry too easy.  Even though I have not cried about this particular case, I have cried about others in the past with the same ending…. Child dies while another sibling is caring for them, because parent is so in love with SO (Significate Other), too lazy to call or text an adult, or too crazy to call or text another adult to watch their children.  The child who is doing the watching usually is a sibling, who is next to the child who dies.  In this case, it is two 3-year old twins (I assume), and I guess, as the most cases are) the 19-month was crying, and they were trying to find a way to quiet the child.

Now there was supposed to be a fourth child in the home, and I wonder where was that child and how old that child was.  If that child was slightly older than the two 3-year olds (age 4-8), that would explain why the mother put that child in charge, but it still does not excuse for the absenteeism of the mother and the boyfriend.  It happens all too often.  A few weeks ago, an 8-year old was put in charge of a 1-year old, I believe, and the 8-year old beat the baby to death, again trying to quiet the child.

As I explained in my post on Facebook, I am childless, and even I know not to leave someone that young in charge of a baby (yes, at 19-months, they are still babies in my eyes).  I am not saying that a child cannot watch another child, but as an adult, you need to be within earshot range to grab the child and go into protective mode, should they get into harm’s way.  Some of the helpful ways that an older sibling under 12 can be helpful are:

·         Listen out for the baby when they should be waking up from a nap.

·         Alert parent when the baby is hungry or needs a diaper change.

·         Entertain the baby with you nearby, not out at the corner store.

·         Feed the baby with you nearby.

·         They can also briefly hold the baby while sitting down.

Again, I do not know nothing of this case, and my prayers go out to all involved.  I am not sure if the mom briefly left the children before, or if this was a first.  Either way now is not the time to criticize her (despite my rant on Facebook).  She has a long road ahead of her, by first laying her child to rest, then dealing with children services, who have no sympathy for the neglect of a child.  After all, even if she and the boyfriend were in the house, which could happen too, it was neglect in children services eyes.  People have left children before, and it will happen again in some other part of the country.

My prayer for parents has always think before you act, and this includes leaving children with others, especially with another child.  Make sure that child is responsible for taking care of that child, and it should be a child over the age of 13.  I did not mention 12 because that age is so awkward.  You are not a little child, but you are not a teen either.

I feel better, and I hope that everyone starts doing a little more thinking.  

No Black Actresses Allowed

Cover of the Hollywood
Reporter (c) 2015 Hollywood
Reporter

Help wanted…. Must be able to go from one emotion to another in 2.2 seconds flat, deliver lines like a pro, and except any roles given.  Apply within.  Oh and P.S. You MUST BE an African American female.  I cannot stress that enough.

This should be the sign that hangs outside of the Hollywood sign (you know, the one in the mountain ranges overlooking the city).

I was reading an Awesome Luvvie article a few moments ago, and she pointed out the Hollywood Reporter’s “Roundtable of great actresses for the year who had won Emmys and Oscars awards.  On the cover, it was all white actresses, and I wondered if they noticed that too, so I read the article.  What was in the article basically was how they made their picks, and yes, they too were surprised that no actresses of color had any awards this year (season or whatever they call it).  I am so glad that you noticed HR because I was going to call you out for being one-sided. 

What I am going to do is call out Hollywood for a second or two.  Not much, but I have this question:  Have all the actresses of color retired this year?  You know who I am talking about:  Angela Bassett, Cicely Tyson, Rosario Dawson, Lupita Nyong, or Kyla Pratt.  What about Whoopi Goldberg or Monique?  Shari Shepard?  I will even throw in Raven Symone (even though I am so over her and her mouth).  They may not win Emmy, Oscar, or even Tony awards, but they can act.  Please hire them for something meaningful, nothing stupid.  I hate comedies or dramas where the African American in the room is so stupid until they are the first ones to get killed in a horror movie, play a drug addict or dealer, a prostitute, a single mom with 44 kids, abuser, or a person that is just plain down and out.  Why can actor or actresses of color be cast in a movie like white people?  If we do, it has to be in an all-black cast according to Hollywood.  No mixed neighborhoods, churches, nothing. 

So, where do we go from here?  I hope that everyone is working in some sort of film, and as for the women who graced the cover of the Hollywood Report magazine, I am not demising their talent at all.  They are all talented actresses, I just would have like a more diverse cover, because I am sure there are some talented Hispanic, Indian, and Asian American Actresses out there who could have been on the cover as well.  My suggestion for Hollywood Reporter is do not write this article anymore, until you can come up with a more diverse cover, because you and Hollywood just offended a few people.

Prayers For Paris

This is a short, improved post.  I am not even in my usual "write in MS Word, then paste" mode.  This is real and raw. So, excuse me if I have spelling and grammar mistakes.  This is not the time to call the grammar police on me, this is way too important than that.

I am upset right now.  I have no words for this kind of senseless act that has happened in Paris, France.  This place is on my bucket list of places I want to see before I die (I am not just about traveling to Disney World folks).

My prayers are that whoever has done this, and I understand that it was a group of people, not just one or two, I pray they are caught and tried for the acts they have done.  This is selfish and cruel.  What I want to know is how can you impede on someone's way of life?  These people have done nothing to you at all.  They had families, jobs, lives, and just because you do not like they way they live, you had to end it?  

Property of Google
Images (c) 2015

Let me point back to America's 9/11.  The day two buildings in New York City had the same fate.  People were just living their lives, getting up, going to work, just living their lives.  all of sudden, buildings came crashing down, and planes crashed (4 of them).  These people, cowards,  disrupted a way of life for these people and their loved ones.

I want to address one more, well two...

Gun violence in this country has escalated a lot.  People are pissed off or mentally disturbed, then kill others on school grounds (elementary, middle, high, and college campuses). There was also the federal building in Oklahoma, where one lone man, Timothy McVay, blow up a building, again disrupting a way of life that men, women, and in this case, children, some who were just born, snatched away from their families, their loved ones.

The important thing is this:  there are too many acts of violence that have happened within the last 30 years or more.  Sure, there have been other killings before Timothy McVay.  The difference is I became an adult during this time.  I have not noticed it when I was a child.  my parents shielded me from this type of media coverage, the breaking news.  My childhood was very cushy compared to today's child.  This is something I have to deal with as an adult, an aunt, and soon to be a mother. (Yes, I am going to start paperwork for adoption in January 2016). How am I suppose to shield my niece, nephews, and potential child from this, and if I had my way, all of it, but I cannot.  No one can take this away, but you can discuss it if they are old enough to have a discussion.  Do not force the issue, only if they ask.
Meanwhile, violence is not the way.  two wrongs do not make a right.  You cannot march with this one.  Besides that, marching leads to violence by either the people doing the marching or by the people the others are marching against.   Not only that, by now, these people who terrorised Paris have gone home, high fiving themselves for a victorious win on their part.  
It is sad that we live in a world, where in order to get a point across, violence has to disrupt the very fiber of a people.  It reminds me so much of the acts against African American males who were killed, as well as the authorities who felt it was necessary to kill now, ask questions later.  The whole thing is just sickening.
Well, it is late, and I must go to bed.  Before I do, I will pray for Paris. I hope you will too.  You do not have to be of a particular religion, just pray in a manner that you were taught to pray.  God hears all who yield to Him.  Good night, Good morning, or wherever you are in this world.  Paris, the world is praying for you.  PEACE!

Let the Adventure begin…. Going outside of your comfort zone to get your story

They have containers!!!
From Tuesday Morning
(c) 2015 P. Lynne Designs

Yesterday was a very eventful day.  Other than the usual waking up in my comfy bed, I had a business women’s meeting (Shout out to Awesome Women in Business).  I got there late, because unless I have my GPS on and secure, I am the most directional challenged person you could ever meet.  I drive a lot, but when I ride with someone who knows where they are going (i.e. my dad), I sit back and run my mouth.  That is what introverts do.  Another subject for a different day.

Anyway, it was on marketing your business, and I can spend a whole hour talking about how to do that with your own business, because I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in marketing, but that is not the subject for today.  Shall we move on?

After the meeting and networking with some of the ladies, who I have not seen since my accident in July, which was due to recovery, and getting my business ready for the holidays, I headed home…or did I?

I think I might add these.
From Tuesday Morning (c) 2015
P. Lynne Designs

I was hungry, but I did not want fast food.  I wanted something new or something that I have eaten in a long time.  This food had to be portable, but soft on my throat, because I am recovering from Strep Throat.  I had not been around the Bethel Road area in a while, so I went on a little adventure.  First I looked at a couple of strip malls, and if you are in the U.S, you know what I mean.  I did not want Chinese food, and one Indian diner looked questionable, so I passed those up.  I found my familiar, Micro Center, which if you do not have one, it is basically a computer store, and I needed to go in there to get some ink, but, as a rule, I do not get my printer ink from a computer store.  The prices are too high unless you find a deal, and I was not up for that.   What I was up for was Tuesday Morning, a store that is similar to Pier 1, World Market, and Big Lots in one store.  They have closeouts and clearances on items.  I looked in (Warning:  Very dangerous stuff ahead…) but walked out with nothing.  Why?  Because I took my credit cards out of my wallet, and at the moment, my bank will not like me if I had bought a candy bar with my debit cards…come on payday.

Cam Asian Market in Columbus, Ohio
(c) 2014 Google Images

Next, and this is where the true adventure began, I stepped next door to Cam, an Asian Market.  Folks, this chick has never been in an Asian market before because I am not Asian.  But this is a post about stepping outside of your comfort zone, and other than a trip to New York or San Francisco to visit Chinatown or even a trip to an Asian country, I get my Chinese food from a bistro around the corner and my Sushi from a diner across town.  Let’s just say that I was the only black chick in the market. 

I can honestly say without a doubt, if you want to fully immerse yourself in someone’s culture, go where the locals go.  Have your doubts, and things that your family and friends have told you about a culture in mind, but let it go when you walk into that culture.  I noticed that the people in the market, basically kept to themselves.  They were not on smartphones, except one, and he and his friend were millennials.  My cart almost ran into a lady, who did not say excuse me.  I said it, I guess she was surprised that I said anything.  The music was quietly playing in the background, and it was not the latest pop music in America, it was THEIR music.  The only English I heard was when I went up to the counter.   Last week, I had forgetting to get eggs in Whole Foods, but the only eggs I found were the type they ate, which were eggs like Thousand-year-old eggs, and boiled eggs in soy sauce.  I bought a piece of yeast Brown sugar bread for $1.99.  It was quite tasty, and if I put the effort in, I can make yeast bread.   They had a very small section of European goodies, but there wasn’t anything American in the store.  I now know where to get my Dim Sum, should I want to cook it, because Columbus’ Chinese restaurants do not like to serve Dim Sum at all.  Finding ingredients for Sushi has never been a problem.   I just do not have the manual dexterity it takes (nor the 10 years of schooling) to make the perfect roll, so I leave it up to the experts.

Brown Sugar Yeast bread from Cam
(c) 2015 P. Lynne Designs

So if you want an adventure, you do not have to spend $1,000 on plane tickets and $300 a night on a hotel room, just to get a blog post going.  Just do what I did yesterday.   Get out of your comfy bed, and go to a part of your city or town that you think you would never venture to, and visit some of the shops.  Become the observant, people watch.  Notice how they act, and write about it.  Be careful about taking pictures, it might not be their way. (I took pictures inside of Tuesday Morning for personal reasons and a project I am working on, but none in the market).  Be respectful of that culture, but do not trash-talk.  This is how we as a nation can begin to heal from all the hurt and pain.  You do not have to agree with everyone, even in your own little corner of the world, but who knows, that little corner may become bigger when someone not like you shares in the moment.  I enjoyed coming out of my comfort zone.